Tantrums, rancid meatloaf and family silver stuffed into underpants: the delicate art of the Holocaust comedy

For some families, the Holocaust is a story that's been passed down through generations - often with a heavy heart. But for writer and filmmaker Kieran Culkin's family, it's become a source of comedic inspiration.

Kieran's grandmother Gisela was known for her sharp tongue and ability to make those around her laugh at their own misfortunes. She once served her son-in-law - Kieran's father - a rotten meatloaf for every meal until he finally ate it. This story has been retold by Kieran, and in recent years, this type of family comedy has become the dominant approach to tell serious Jewish history.

This shift is attributed to the growing distance between third-generation survivors and their lived experiences. As a result, they're finding new ways to process these stories - often using humour to soften the blow.

Jesse Eisenberg's directorial debut "A Real Pain" explores this tension perfectly. The film takes a grief tourism tragicomedy approach, with its protagonist Benji persuading his cousin David to pose for photos as Polish fighters in front of the Monument to the Heroes of Warsaw statue. While David is uncomfortable, Benji's antics bring levity to an otherwise sombre experience.

In another "grief tourism" film, "Treasure," Ruth travels to Poland with her Auschwitz-survivor father Edek to see where his family used to live. Their bickering undercuts many of the film's more solemn moments. When Ruth finally buys back her murdered grandmother's tea set from the Poles who took over Edek's apartment, he responds by saying she has no idea how much it means to him - only that she now has a teapot.

These stories are not meant to belittle the tragedy of the Holocaust but rather find a balance between solemnity and levity. They allow access to narratives and create space for human foibles, even in our darkest stories.

For writer Kieran Culkin's family, humour became an essential part of processing their history - allowing them to find closure and share their story with future generations.

I don't know about this new wave of Holocaust comedies... I mean, my grandma always used to tell me these crazy stories when I was a kid, but they were never like that . She had this one joke about her husband's sister-in-law, it was so funny... anyway, I guess it's good that people are trying to find ways to make the past more relatable and not just so serious all the time. But sometimes I feel like we're losing some of the gravity of what actually happened... my friend's cousin went to Auschwitz and it changed him forever, you know? It's like, yeah, let's have a good laugh every now and then, but don't forget where we came from .

awww man dis is so heartwarming!! i love how kieran's fam is using humor to make the holo experience more accessible & not just super serious all the time the way they're finding new ways 2 process these stories is truly inspiring like yeah, it's not about makin fun of the tragedy but rather showin its complexities thru laughter & tears

The idea that making people laugh is the best way to bring up super sad stuff like the Holocaust is kinda weird, but at the same time I guess it's a way for families to cope? Like my grandma always says, "when life gives you lemons, make lemonade"... or in this case, when life gives you a genocide, find something to laugh about . I mean, if it works for Kieran Culkin's fam, then I'm all for it, right?

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans. - John Lennon

I think this approach to telling serious stories like the Holocaust is a good reminder that even in the darkest times, there's always room for levity and human connection. It's not about trivializing the tragedy, but about finding ways to process our emotions and share our experiences with others in a way that feels authentic. And who knows, maybe this type of storytelling will help break down barriers between generations and create a more nuanced understanding of history.

idk about this grief tourism thing its just a bunch of people cashing in on others suffering...i mean i get it some families use humor to deal with the trauma but its not like they're making light of it or anything its more like they're trying to make sense of it and find a way to move forward . my grandma's side was all about the serious stories and how we lost our family in the war, but now i see what they mean by finding balance between solemnity and levity...i guess its good for them to share their experiences too

It's wild how people are finding ways to cope with the serious stuff by injecting a bit of humor into it . I mean, I get it, the Holocaust is this incredibly heavy topic that can be really tough for families to deal with. But at the same time, laughter is like, the best medicine, right? It's not like they're making light of what happened or anything, just finding a way to share their experiences in a way that feels more... relatable, you know?

I love how Kieran Culkin's family is using this type of humor to process their history and find closure. And it's cool that there are other people out there doing the same thing, like with those "grief tourism" films . It just goes to show that everyone's got a different way of dealing with tough stuff, and that's what makes life so interesting.

idk why ppl gotta make Holocaust comedy it feels like they're makin a joke outta people's lives... but I guess if its about his fams stories, who is he 2 blame? at least hes findin ways 2 share their story w/o losin the levity... grief tourism films can b heavy but its good 2 see ppl makin light of somethin that's supposed 2 be sad

I'm not sure I love this shift towards using comedy to tackle serious topics like the Holocaust . Don't get me wrong, it's awesome that Kieran's family is finding a way to cope, but I worry that we're losing some of the gravity and respect for those who went through unimaginable trauma . Grief tourism films can be a delicate balance between levity and solemnity, and it's not always easy to get it right . That being said, if it means more people are engaging with these stories and finding closure, then I'm all for it . But let's not forget the complexity of history – we need to find a way to acknowledge both the pain and the beauty in our stories .

I think this approach is super played out . Like, I get that some families are trying to cope by finding the humor in their histories, but it's just gonna come off as insensitive or flippant when it's supposed to be about one of the most tragic events in human history. Can't we just take a more somber approach and really delve into the emotional weight of it all? The whole "grief tourism" thing is already kinda exploitative, don't need to add comedy on top too .

I don't get why people are so quick to dismiss this approach to telling the Holocaust story . I mean, sure, using comedy might not be the most conventional way to tackle such a serious topic, but isn't it refreshing to see a different angle? It's like how some people prefer watching funny movies about serious issues instead of all seriousness all the time. It makes it more relatable and humanizes the experience for everyone .

Plus, as you said, the Holocaust is already pretty heavy-hearted, so why not lighten the mood a bit? I'm not saying they're making light of the tragedy, but finding balance between solemnity and levity isn't a bad thing. It's like how some people need to talk about their feelings with friends or watch a funny video to process their emotions – it's all about perspective .

It's also interesting that these "grief tourism" films are making access to narratives more accessible to everyone, not just third-gen survivors. I mean, who says you can't laugh and cry at the same time? It's all about finding your own way to process the story, right?

I'm loving this shift in storytelling, it's so refreshing to see Jewish history being told in a way that doesn't feel too heavy . Like, I get that the Holocaust is no joke, but can we please not forget to have some laughs along the way? These films like "A Real Pain" and "Treasure" are doing just that, and it's amazing how they're able to tackle tough topics without losing their sense of humor . It's like, my grandma used to say (not literally, obvi) that laughter is the best medicine... unless you have a meatloaf that's gone bad . Anyway, I think this approach is genius and I'm here for it!

I'm like "meatloaf for dinner every day" - I mean, who needs that kind of pressure? But seriously, it's crazy how a tragic event like the Holocaust can become the basis for comedy. It just goes to show you, when life gives you lemons, make lemonade... and then serve your dad rotten meatloaf .

I think this shift in approach is actually kinda refreshing - it's not all doom and gloom all the time! And I love how these films use humour to humanize these stories. It's like, yeah, sure, things were tough, but let's not forget that even in dark times, we can find a way to laugh together .

And omg, "A Real Pain" sounds hilarious - I need to watch it ASAP! Grief tourism just became my new favorite thing . Can't wait to see what other comedy-meets-tragedy films come out!

I gotta say ... I get where they're coming from . It's like, how do you even talk about something as heavy as the Holocaust without losing your mind? But at the same time, I think it's kinda problematic when people use humor to trivialize the tragedy. I mean, can't we just acknowledge the pain and suffering that went down ? Don't get me wrong, I love a good laugh too, but I don't want my funny bone to come at the expense of someone else's trauma . Still, I think it's cool that Kieran Culkin's family is using humor to process their history in their own way . It's all about finding balance, right?

I'm not sure about this new wave of "grief tourism" comedies... I mean, I get that humor can be a way to cope, but is it really the right way to tackle something as serious as the Holocaust? It feels like we're trivializing the experience for the sake of entertainment. And don't even get me started on the bickering in "Treasure" – it's hard to take that seriously when Ruth and Edek are sniping at each other instead of, I don't know, having a real conversation about their past.

Wow those family comedies about the Holocaust are so cool! Interesting how writers are finding ways to balance seriousness & levity when it comes to sharing these heavy stories . Guess you can't make people laugh at the most sensitive topics, but it's still a way to process and share history without being too down .

idk how some ppl feel about this "grief tourism" thing tho ... its like the filmmakers are exploiting the trauma of others 4 laughs ... dont get me wrong, i love a good comedy, but can't we just have a serious movie about the holocaust without makin it into a joke?

I think it's kinda weird how some people are using comedy to deal with the Holocaust, like they're trying to laugh away the pain . I mean, I get that it's a way for third-gen survivors to cope, but is it really the right approach? Can't we find a way to honor their experiences without makin' light of 'em?

I'm kinda torn about this whole "grief tourism" thing ... on one hand, I get it, we need to keep the stories of the Holocaust alive, but at the same time, can't we just, like, take a break from laughing for once? I mean, don't get me wrong, my grandma used to make these hilarious faces when she was cooking up some terrible meatloaf... but that's not exactly what you're doing when you're visiting Auschwitz and taking photos with your cousin in a fake WWII outfit . It feels like we're losing the gravity of it all in our attempts to find levity . Can't we just, like, respect the seriousness of it all?

I'm so down with this approach , I mean, what's the point of dwelling on all that serious sadness? Let's just have a good laugh about it! It's like my aunt used to say, "when life gives you lemons, make lemonade... and then spill the lemonade on your shirt" . This way we're not forgetting the past but also keeping our sanity. Plus, it's all about finding closure, right? And if a bit of silliness helps people connect with their heritage, who am I to argue?